Monday, 24 June 2013

Poetry Corner 3: World War Z

So apparently you guys aren't sick of my incompetent poetry and have even asked for more. So without further ado, welcome to Poetry Corner 3. All my lovely prefacing will come after the poem...Which technically makes it postfacing, but that isn't a word. English has failed me once again. Also, if you are interested this style of poem is called a Rubiyat I believe. (Also also, read Z in the American English Zee, forgive me)

A few days ago, I went to see.
The movie adaptation of a book, World War Z
I had heard Brad Pitt had ruined it so.
But even those rumours, didn't prepare me

As I said down with friends to watch this delight.
One uttered we were in for a fright.
But not because of gore or zombies and such.
Merely in sorrow at this misdirected plight.

Now World War Z, the original book
Is genius, often prone to overlook
But the movie made no attempt to capture this grace.
Rather the license was just a cynical hook.

Brad Pitt swanned about on screen
Looking all white, clean and pristine
Only visits four locations in this tale
Whereas the book covers at least seventeen.

My heart rose when they went to Israel.
A great part of the book, easy to nail!
But they ruined it with a zombie Pyramid
And so I resigned to endure this sorry tale.

The Zombies themselves were also a blow
In the books, they were really quite slow.
But in this film they run at full dash.
And so the final score sinks low.

The scope and the scale paled to the material source.
Which makes me wonder why they chose this course.
If you want to make a zombie movie...Fine with me.
But why did you call it World War Z?

Now as for the promised postfacing, I eventually ended up writing so much that I think I can still write a full size article on how World War Z disappointed me on every level. Though I might turn it into the script for a youtube rant, which would you prefer fans, if you care enough to comment. I imagine I'll do the written word, more succinct and you won't have to hear my deep and gravelly voice. 


  1. I think I'd like to hear you rant.

    1. I think I'd like to hear him beg.

    2. Hmm...Well, I'm going to go ahead and say this is the first comment to leave me slightly speechless. Begging isn't my style sir/ma'am.

  2. This was hard as yours is so good and covers everything, but here goes.

    Zombies and the great undead
    Skin peeling from a withered head
    Each painful step as if of lead
    Theyseek their lair
    The Summer season's 'worth a look'
    Brad Pitt its (quite attractive) hook
    Based on novel by Max Brook
    Whose tearing out his hair.

    Yours is better.

    1. The glorious subjective nature of poetry means I can assert yours is better with equal fervour.

      How I missed the chance to put Brooks in the Ook section I'll never know.

  3. I fear for your life if you put anything else on youtube, maybe write this one...?

    1. Hopefully people aren't as inclined to threaten the integrity of my body over World War Z, but perhaps you are right.

  4. Persian style poetry, impressed. Was the film, while clearly not true to the book, sufficiently fun to qualify as the summer blockbuster?

    1. Ahh, a man who knows his poetry, most excellent. Yeah, I think that is the saddest part, it was a perfectly fine summer blockbuster, but with absolutely no relation to World War Z.

      I'd probably even have to recommend it if you want rugged man fighting zombies.

    2. Does Brad Pitt still qualify as 'rugged'? There is a book called Apocalypse Z whose plot sounds so similar that one must surely have copied the other, have you read it?

    3. I've heard of it yes, I think it was translated, so the name might not be from the original, but yes, it does reek of opportunism. I've heard largely good things though. But it would be hard to compete with WWZ.

      He is certainly trying to appear rugged still, looks like an aging Hemsworth now though.

  5. My apologies. If I'd got Max BrookS name right my poem woul suck even more. However, look forward to the next, Mr Chapman.

    1. I didn't mean it like that, I still think yours rocked, and thank you, still trying to work out what day is best to make weekly, for now Monday/Sunday shall suffice.

  6. Ok.
    The Cynics got comments galore
    All polite, well read and mature (ahem)
    So who would have thought
    World War z would be fought
    Over xbone against ps4.

    I'm shutting up now.

    1. Everyone has such shame over their poetry, keep up the good work.

  7. Talking of wars, you haven't done a political blog lately. I, for one, am confused by the Syria situation and it would be great if someone (you?) Could clarify it.

    1. I actually considered this a few days ago when explaining it to some friends, I think I just might, thanks for the vote of confidence.

  8. You are forgiven 'zee' this time, as long as long as you don't try anything as sneaky again. Tick, vg.

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