Wednesday, 27 March 2013

So, What About Cynics? (Updates, Hotline Miami and North Korea Edition)

Hello there, long time, I guess. If you are one of the inexplicable 300-500 (on average over the last month) people who check out this website daily, you may have noticed that I haven't been posting recently and for that I am sorry. If you follow the shenanigans of my life via this website or twitter, read on, if not, skip to the funny stuff down below. Ok, so you will be pleased to hear hopefully that the reason I haven't posted for this entire period of time hasn't been down to my break up, it is mostly because I've been really busy with university work. I won't go into the whole sob story of why I was behind as it really isn't interesting. But safe to say after April 11th I will have a lot more time for the website and content creation at large.
(I don't currently look this suave, check end of article for actual representation)
 I made this to signal my return, but I realised that posting it would make me look like a dick...
Ahh damnit. 

So yes, I apologise for my absence, but now I'm back and writing (When I should probably be writing a boring project on Denmark), what should I write about, well I figure, short of making this another dire "I update you on stuff I plan to do one", it'll only be half that, and half stuff I've been doing on my month away. First things first though, let us talk shop.

The What About Cynics Podcast

So one development, and probably the only real thing I've contributed to the site over the past month, is that of the WaC: Podcast, at the time of writing currently two, 2 hour long recordings of us discussing the films of 2012 in varying degrees of detail. The response to these has been positive, which is surprising given that they are barely edited, posted many, many months late, and generally abused by the editor-in-chief. But apparently we can do little wrong in the eyes of those who watch, and so consequently it is our aim to have the first ever concrete release schedule in What About Cynics history and will be making them once every fortnight...

Now before it sounds like we are too organised, we were suppose to do one on the weekend, and should be now doing it tonight after that failed, so as ever don't believe it until you see it, but we both really enjoyed doing the two podcasts, and if we enjoy something then that usually means we will actually try to get it done. 

While I am talking about this actually, any suggestions of topics you like talked about, etc, you can leave in the comments section below, or via e-mail at I think we might be popular enough at this point that there is some merit. If nothing else, hopefully it will be funny.

The What About Cynics Webcomic

Ok, so now that we've dealt with the podcast, it is time to talk about the oldest institution existing on What About Cynics. The Webcomic. Now as some of you may remember from this update, the person who drew those comics was my now ex-girlfriend. Consequently, in the ensuing now nearly two months (wow doesn't time fly) a new webcomic artist  has joined us. Despite his slightly inappropriate name, he has the bonuses of being in charge of both writing and drawing, and also probably being a funnier on them than I was.

However, as Shakespeare once wrote, the course of true love never runs smoothly, and apparently neither does "shutting down your joint-webcomic", so consequently, parallel to Mr Gobbla's artistic endeavour, you may see the return, in some form, of our original artist. So stay tune for that cluster****

(Hence why I posted that picture up the top there, it is technically "new"). 

The rest of the Article

So anyway, now I've spread the word of what is happening to the realm, I should probably talk about something funny.

Part of me wants to talk about Hotline Miami, but I think I will wait until I've completed it and the screenshot function is working, it probably deserves an article of its own. Though if you don't know what it is, hopefully these will tide you over.

But yeah, I will get to that game another day soon. Probably the next article.

In Other News

Meanwhile In North Korea

North Korea has been acting batshit insane again recently. Threatening everything from turning the United States mainland into ash, cutting all forms of communications with the South, and adopting "Combat Posture Number 1", which seems ostensibly designed to reduce the United States mainland to ash. 

With all this good will talk going on in the area, understandably Japan and South Korea are mildly concerned, as they are most likely to be on the receiving end of any suicide blitz that North Korea is going to try. The United States is treating this to be the Cold War it has been so sorely missing for the past two decades and has of course, turned up the rhetoric itself while paradoxically also urging calm. 

Now with Hugo Chavez dead, Fidel Castro and Robert Mugabe really old, Assad quite busy and Ahmadinejad on his way out, Kim Jong Un is now one of the few people I can wake up in the morning and think "I wonder what that mad bastard is up to", and now he is threatening to balls that up as well, I tell you, since the Cold War ended, the military strongman is gradually becoming extinct.

Meanwhile in the Central African Republic

So in the Central African Republic, which as you may not be surprised to find out exists in the middle of Africa (Map and position below, don't say I never teach you anything), things in the several month rebellion have taken a turn for the worst when the Rebels took over the capital of Bangui and caused the president, Francois BozizĂ© to flee to neighbouring Cameroon. 

Really he should've fled to DRC, it would've been fuel efficient. 

The reason that this overthrow has got comparatively little news or intervention compared to the Mali crisis seems to basically boil down to that this is a more common occurrence for the Central African Republic. There are already a plethora of foreign-national troops stationed in CAR, from the French and South Africans, to neighbours such as Chad and Cameroon.

It also probably helps that this is more of a political situation than Mali, where the word "Islamist" was mentioned once and consequently the entire world went into a fit, as such, large scale French intervention as seen in Mali is unlikely here, which is just as well, Hollande is suppose to be a socialist. I don't think he ran on a platform promising to reboot the French Empire.

So that wasn't a terrible returning article. Two news stories, an update, and a video game preview. Anyway, hopefully you'll be reading me again soon, I'm going to try and get another article out before April 4th, and then we should be on a roll. 

There he is, except for his more stylish dress sense, basically just Nicolas Cage in Raising Arizona. 


  1. good to see you are back, I can get the question ball rolling. What are your favourite comedies?

    1. That might be an interesting discussion for the podcast...?

    2. I was going to go for favourite/sexiest child actors, but yours is more marketable. Thanks again viewers.

    3. Will you deal with more than one question per podcast?

    4. I'd have thought so. Got to fill an hour or several hours of time with stuff, may as well have some quantity to make up for the lack of quality.

    5. To answer your question in a non-pessimistic way, then yes, we can deal with more than one question per podcast.

      They will probably be what rounds off the podcast anyway.