Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Babe: The movie: The game: The movie: The game: The horror


     




For a game released on PS2 at the brink of the PS3 era, Babe still manages to pack one hell of a surprise in the console's twilight years. Not a good surprise however like actually playing a good game like 'Leisure suit Larry- Magna Cum Laude' or the sadly under appreciated 'The Guy Game'.

10/10

But it's the kind of surprise where you meet up with a strange man for an innocent round of cottaging, only to wake up in an ice bath with both your ass and chest cavity surrounding your kidney gaped. The pulse of hepatitis C coursing through your veins - 3/10. But back to the review.


We can only hope that conveyor belt leads to the Abattoir and the painful slaughter that Babe deserves

Babe. It's the kind of game which forces you to stare at a Low Res picture of Babe seemingly screaming as ice shards bore their way towards his skull. It's a world of grey, old janitors wasting their miserable, back-breaking lives away around the filth of farm animals, too indifferent to do anything about the puzzle solving madness engulfing them. 
   
Go on to talk to certain friendly clothed chimps around the world and their text boxes will frequently respond to you not with their expected quotes of hints and (P.G) tips, but instead “message not found”, making you feel like you've fallen through the thin layer of reality that separates the Babe universe and the matrix. Its major saving grace is that like any thoughtful grandparent it euthanises itself around the fifteenth level as the game will inevitably crash and remains uncompletable to this day. 

Not that you'd ever find out this information, as Babe remains the hardest game I have ever played and I've completed all the modes on Rapelay, which took many hours and was an insanely tedious experience. On the other hand, Rapelay has done the opposite of what its critics feared and has put me off rape because now I know that it would be the most drawn out and boring experience of my life, making it much more efficient to just try and talk to a lady instead.

Edutainment - 6.32/10

In conclusion then Babe is an honourable last encore for the PS2 as it hammers the last nail into the coffin of the PS2 era. I give it 2.3/2 for sound.







3 comments:

  1. You've probably exhausted all you have to say about rapelay, but that paragraph was the best of this, the game seemed like comedy gold as long as you aren't a Republican

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  2. Love this. Made my day. Put up some more pics of it to save me money but so that I still get to see all the levels. Haha, golden!

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    1. I'd happily do that if Babe wasn't destroyed in a ceremonial burning that took place in the garden soon after playing the game.
      There aren't that many levels to show either because as I said, this game just kind of ends itself early.
      I would tell you to go on google images and search "babe the game" for more, but that just seems to lead to loads of pictures of half naked women, or babes I guess. It's funny to see though because amongst all the tits and skin, the fifth image is an actual cover of the game, which seems really out of place and kind of sad.
      Glad you enjoyed the article anyway.

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